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Terminally Real

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🧠 Month 4 Checkpoint — September 1, 2025

Four months since craniotomy (May 1, 2025)
Diagnosis: Glioblastoma, IDH-wildtype (CNS WHO Grade 4)

Yehoshua’s Voice:

"Four months have passed.
I don't even know how much time I’ve got left.
I'm not going to get all this shit done.

I had eight months from the time of surgery — now I’m halfway through.
I got 12, I got 8.
Let’s see what happens.

It really sucks.
It's like one of those whack-a-mole games.
Is it this day? Is it that day?
You just never know."

"It’s been a hell of a ride since that day.
Surgery. Spent way more time in the hospital than I wanted.
Going crazy not being able to work.
Financial issues — I’m over $2,000 a week in the hole.
ER visits. Stress.

But at least the last round of chemo went okay.
I’ve got another 5 or so left before..."

(To be continued…)

"If I can just get out to see my mom, my sister Tammi, and my daughter, I’ll be happy.
I want to see them again.
Hopefully I get another eight months, maybe a year.
That’d be enough.

My tumor was pretty small — I don’t know what that means.
I’ve got an MRI coming up soon.

At least I don’t have to worry about that damn spinal cord stimulator anymore.
I’m free of that now.
I can get an MRI anywhere in the world and not have to think about it."

"I feel bad I can’t help anyone.
I need money too — I can’t spend everything I’ve got.
I’ve got medical insurance to take care of, or I won’t make it.

It would mean everything to get the family together.
My mom. Tammi. Sheri.
Even if it’s just for a couple days.

It’s been a long time.
I don’t think Sheri even remembers Tammi.
Probably been 30 years."

"Wouldn’t it be something if I made it to my birthday, January 13th?
I’ll be 58.
That’d be a funky birthday, wouldn’t it?"

"Today’s just been off.
Woke up at 2. Took a nap. Still tired. Just not right.

Been listening to the trees outside — they sound like they’re screaming.

At least the weather’s cool.
Humidity’s low.
Doesn’t make my brain act up."

🩺 Clinical Snapshot (Context Only — Secondary):

Elapsed Time Since Surgery: 4 months
Estimated Survival Window: 8–12 months post-craniotomy
Tumor: Small, aggressive (GBM, Grade 4)

Treatment:
– 6-week Stupp protocol completed (radiation + temozolomide)
– Adjuvant chemo ongoing (5 more rounds expected)
– Dexamethasone tapering

Upcoming: MRI due soon
Device Removed: spinal cord stimulator — full MRI access restored
Main Focus Now: Family, stability, clarity, and time.